My View From The Litter Box

My View From The Litter Box
Cats pets humor

Thursday, November 30, 2006


LOOK MOM, NO THONG!





















Love the abs of steel girlfriend!!

  • yanno, not that anyone here in europe, really cares. But iam quite sure there are pleanty of those american family value folks running amuck in the states that are in a outrage over britney spears and her idea of playing, show the kooter to the camara!
    Yes, those folks were the ones, that embraced that little hick tramp when she first came into the limelight. Some deemed her good ole fashion hometown girl, bubble gum pop songs for teens. wholesome,pure were the words used to describe little miss louisiana !

    sadly in time , changes were fixed upon the princess of pop. Her wholesome family values were put to the test during her, quickie marriage in Las Vegas. Then came the dude that left his bun in the oven girlfriend , for britney and why she just done jumped at the chance to be with a man who dumps kids for the chance to become.. MR.britney spears!
    kevin federline, the man who became a gelding after saying i do ! I mean we can throw in the fact that he was a former dancer too, but lets not dwell to far into kevins past.Even his CD sucked worse then his dancing!
    In time even thier reality tv show couldint save two hicks from each other and divorce papers were processed and thus now we have the current ideal star values for all of the american family value folks! I swear i can hear the ripping of posters if i put a ear to the wind, by angry parents who were decieved by this tramp. EEEDIOTS!!!!!!!!!!! But like the saying goes, you get what you pay for! so happy times at home depo for plaster to cover all those former poster tacks inside teenagers bedrooms by the parents. PS toothpaste works just as well if long lines tend to make you not so christian like.

    MOE POSION!!!!! http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6159343.stm

    Its like some sick fad now adays to be russian, live in russia or have lived there, leave the country and come back sick from unknown toxins! Now a former PM has taken ill and doctors are saying its not known substance therefore they have said, yep, POSION!
    yanno that was such a silly band from the late 80s early 90s btw,, but enough about glam rock. Lets get back to the matter at hand. I mean, like i typed in my cat blog last week, there isint a snow balls chance in hell my owners are going to travel to England anytime soon.
    Hell, even the airliners are showing up signs of radiation. Is this due to cost cut backs? yanno no more bag of peanuts or free drinks but now we at BA can offer our customers some radiation at no additonal cost? I think id rather eat the incredible shitty airline food then take up this new offer!
    So, for folks in england, iam sure your country is nice and all with the big ben and london bridge and the queen but yanno for even less money , my owners can download google earth and see all the fine and dandy things for pretty much free. and far far far away from any radiation or spooks and spies that seem to just be running amuck in packs!

    Home alone and really not thrilled about it. yes, seems ´´the spoiler´´ is off at some formal company meeting and then a xmas party of which they were advised to attend by some bigwigs. Nothing like being a party you just know will suck, or not. It pretty much depends on the persons at your table . I mean from what i overheard my owners say, if you get seated to the over 50 folks, one can forget about any fun. Now for a younger bunch say mid 30s one can probably expect alot more laughter coming from that table oh and lotta wine bottles being orderd too! If i was a human, id beg for a seat at the table of winos!!!!!!!
    So tonight i have ´´wasderface´´ for entertainment and iam telling ya folks, they are about as much fun as say, a library. very quiot, Its eveing here now and ive been sleeping since ´´the spoiler ´´ left home and that was 12 hours ago!
    well i think thats it from here. Time to go bother my brother cain and see if i can play with em and check the food bowl and get some dinner in me for tonights , YAWN adventure.
    who knows, they ´´wasderface´´ might suprise me and break open a 6 pack of beer, grab the drum sticks, throw on the headphones and air drum to some serious tunes! Nope we arent talking any britney spears either! ROCK N ROLL!!!!!!!! I just hope ´´wasderface´´ dont throw a stick by accident ,break something and end up blaming us cats! if they were smart they would like go use ´´the spoilers´´ new electric guitar they got em for xmas and snap some strings on it because they play it like its a bass!! yeah, thats a idea!!

    WORDS OF WISDOM!!!!! Absence makes the heart grow fonder :)

    CIAO!!!!!

























ALL THATS MISSING IS THE COLOR YELLOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!















  • And I would take on the appearance of a stoplight. Or maybe a walking cat xmas display .

speaking of yellow, it seems that poor ole Rush Limbaugh said he wasint going to carry anyones water anymore. Well looking at the ,man boobed,jowel drooping ,sweat glands on overload, I cant go to Vietnam i have a cyst on my ass, stud muffin, id say the only thing hes carried is a very large UPS shipment box that arrived at his place. Containing large bottles of oxycotin and viagra. Not to mention the boxes of Krispy Cream doughnut boxes too. So are we supposed to go awwww poor Rush. Nah more like tuff rush. I like it when they bigmouths lose and then blame it on other folks. Kinda like Mark Foley and his turn the page moments he had during his yrs in office down in florida. Yanno the guys on his team somehow turned it around , making it sould like it wasint marks fault! Why yes, every 52 yr old man who asks a 16 yr boy what they are wearing and to strip down on Instant messages, shouldint be judged. Why its his drinking and nothing more! Right.

Now it appears that the republicans are losing money from the last elections and even lizzy dole sent out a memo saying that we need more contributors to help us in the 2008 presidental elections otherwise we cant fend off the opposistion.

Yes,, i mean iam sure it took lots of money during the relections for the republicans to like buy off some reporter or ask and or bribe a national syndicated newspaper to hold off on a story untill after the relections. Not to mention all those parties they threw. I guess i can understand that it does cost alot of money to hire all those male prostitues and dont forget folks, drugs arent cheap and hiring conections for the Ice heads, well that too took many of money from em. Maybe they can ask Kathy Harris to like sell off her daddys house and all his money he gave her to restore some sort of monetary value within the republicans campain( yep typo was on purpose) But iam afraid, Miss harris is too busy hiring lawyers to make sure her drop dead face wont be sued come the time when florida recounts its votes and of course checks out kathys other shaddy dealings. Heres a idea, maybe they can have a websight called, sponsor a crook!

For as little as one paycheck per week, you too can offer a disgraced former member of congress or the senate , a chance to sneak back into office using the well spent money of the United States taxes payers. Dont forget what the bible says, to forgive is divine! so remember folks,, for as little as one pay check per week, you can help feed a starving lobbyist or former republican outsed from office. Wont you please call now. The numbers on your screen.!! 1-800-44283-746633. ( calls will cost one dollar and 38 mins per min) They can use ANNE COULTER as the sally struthers of feed the repugs now movment!!!

Some wierd news to talk about, check this story my owners found on line.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/11/29/ap/strange/mainD8LMG6AO0.shtml. Seems this man was hell bent on taking this guitar. Nothing could stop em NOTHING! I mean, he must have had on one super duper metal jock strap on or some major shaving took place as well, prior to this brilliant idea he had. The guitar comes with (electric ones), at least two pick ups, which iam sure he felt and if it had a humbucker on, well iam sure his felt it too! Maybe his humbucker liked that!Now thats justs just plain nuts. (pun intended) AND if i was a customer going into that music shop, id be making sure the electric guitar i buy for say a beginer, isint the one that this guy took. Demand it be writen down on paper by the shop owner that this guitar isint that one that touched the dudes family jewels. GROSS GROSS GROSS!!!!!!! amazing the dude didint even make a sound as he walked out of the store with a electric guitar pressed against certian parts of his body! Makes one wonder what else hes capable of stuffing down his pants and making off with it.

id pay to see em try to steal battery operated toothbrush kit and it goes off as hes making his way out of the store! why theres no limit to that one folks. lemme see what else i can talk to ya fine folks this eveing about. Not alot really. Seems that ´´the spoiler´´ will be gone for 48 hours due to bizz and a company xmas party. how splendid for me! why its me and ´´wasderface´´ along with cain, just the 3 of us. I think ill stay up late tonight so i can sleep alot come tomorow. I mean i like ´´wasderface´´ but ´´ the spoiler´´ is my main owner whom i love deeply. Plus man can they ever give excellent belly scratches and rubs too. Sadly all that ´´wasderface´´ can do with some form of equality is, well feed me and scoop my poop from the litter box and make sure i get fresh cold water daily. sure they pet me and stuff, but in the end i always end up fake charging em and watching em duck is so much fun folks! Like i would really attempt to beat up a human being?

So thats it from here, thanks for stoping on down and reading this blog. Hope you folks have a great whatever, where ever ya might be. Talk to ya fine folks again tomorow . Till then,

Words of Wisdom.,,, It is what It is.

CIAO!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

  • UNDERCOVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Well hello again fine folks that read this blog of mine. Things at current are ok here in the land of wild pigs and beer! Speaking of pigs , it seems that in a small town in bravaria, some hunters inadverntly drove some wild boars inside the town , where upon entry, the sows went on a lets bite and attack humans, cars and invade small shops.

This can be found at www.thespiegel.com for further info. Some of the wild boars even swam across a river to excape the hunters, and thats where the shit hit the fan. I cant imagine a wild looking beast bitch like one of those coming at me ! At least with us cats, we can run and climb a tree. Sadly a old lady was knocked off her bike by one of the swines from hell and biten. Oh and one even made contact with a car , which resulted in 5000 euro of damage too. I said it befour and ill say it again, wild pigs just suck! they are mean, have tusks and dont like pets nor ppl much. But then again if the bravarian town officals got off thier ass and started making some changes to the over population of such swines, maybe this wouldint have happend. I mean, they protect wild pigs,but, just blow away a wild brown bear that was reintroduced into the bravarian mts due to the fact that there arent any bears there anymore. Italy sponsored this re entry for bears and what do their neighbors do,? why just have some moron plug it from 150 feet away as it was sitting there. YET wild pigs are a no no to plug? Turns out the local police did the job the elemer fudd hunters didint do and well last i heard there was some plenty of bacon being prepared! MORONS!

Onto other news. My my , it seems that even more polonium was discoverd in other parts of london today. WTF is this? a tisket a tasket, some polonium in a basket? Kinda makes ya wonder who´s keeping a eye on such dangerous poisons around the world. I mean, it seems russian stock piles that shit like say some fans do with beer during the superbowl! So much for my owners plans to visit britian next yr. Who wants to take the chance of coming into contact with man made shit that well if your unlucky to come into contact with, die? because there is no antidote for it. Nah,,the tea and krumpets and all that good ole english stuff is gonna have to wait. I think my owners value life to much to take a chance at this unreal stupidity of the british goverment and thier lack of keeping tracks of spooks and spies running amuck in thier country.

The humans were watching the news tonight and yes, there was GWB giving his speech about he wont pull out the troops from iraq untill the mission is complete.

Um what mission is this again? forgive us dear leader, we the public kinda lost track on this and that you and your morons have been telling the world now for over 3 and half yrs. First it was to give the ppl of iraq a better life,yanno cause of all those weapons of mass destruction that were there? Rrrright. Well that didint work out like planned. And nope, none of the coaliton forces were greeted as liberators and flowers were not thrown at thier feets. Lotta of self made bombs were thats for sure but nope, no flowers. Unless jr.dipshit and his side kick big dick meant flowers made from exposive devices,, then yes, ok. Now rumor has it that poodle puppy blair might say it oh piss off george and pull his troops out. Why that would leave the USA with ,,,,,um wait its coming to me now,, ,,,oh yeah no one else ! Just them and those flowers made from grenades we talked about. Sadly the war is and continues to be about MONEY! how its made, whos making it and profiting bigtime from it. And it sure as hell isint the Iraq ppl,nor the troops over there either. At least my owners can sit back and say,, nope never voted for the jr.dipshit. Something about a man who has a sneer and a laugh in his eyes, when he speaks about death and destruction. Um something isint right with that dude. I think GWB motto should be ´´ pissing off the planet, one country at a time´´! because thats what hes doing.

Not alot else to talk to ya fine folks about this fine night. ´´the spoiler´´ and ´´wasderface´´ decided to try the Mcdonalds cheesy bacon deluxe burger and well sadly ´´ the spoiler´´ payed for this. Even Alka selzter cant touch the bad stomach ache from eating that garbage! ´´wasderface ´´ faired better but iam wondering for how long? Dont forget folks, one of ems gotta stay healthy for me and cains sake. We cannot allow humans to become sick and not take care of us cats!

well thats it from here. Hope things are fine and dandy in your neck of the woods. oh and the pope made a visit to turkey today. Glad to see that went ok. Now if everyone can put aside past issues and act like adults, id be even more happier yanno? Take care folks and talk to ya probably again tomorow night. till then,

WORDS OF WISDOM. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? HINT,, well if you stick inside the microwave, you will get your answer ;)

CIAO!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, November 28, 2006


CHILLING!!
Hello and good eveing, morning or whatever it is where ever the hell you fine folks are reading this blog!
Not alot to jabber about . Things here are kinda in a toss up. I might be moving along with my owners. Yes, even germany makes some fouls when it comes to jobs and mergers and pretty much messing up a good companys way of doing things.
Course its not yet offical that this company (coughs sparkassen informatic)
is going to be closing some branches, but its a coming like divorce papers smacked down on kid rock today! Kudos to pam for seeing the light.
But anyways, my owners were scouting new places to live should this piss poor managed merger take place.
I cant say that any of the places they looked at via the internet, looked appealing to me. To small ,to big, way to much windows, etc. I like my current dump i call home. But i guess worse case possible, me and the humans got like 5 yrs to make a decison either stay in germany and play the shell game with ´´wheres the job´´?
or say pffft and make the move north!
Yes, canada! Home of the land of bacon, whereas one slice is so unforgiven to the colon, many have fled for toilets!
Plus condos and houses there are pretty cheap and if one chooses to buy a house, it comes with some major land too! Now that i like. I mean, if they do buy a house then i can go outside with a kitty leash on and begin my sniffing of the unknown land and smells :)
Knowing my luck, id probably be scared back into the house by some screech owl of sniff my way into a pile of doggie doo doo! Yep murphys law applies to my life.
Iam a city kitty. Born and raised among the grime of car fumes and the loud ambulances that race past the streets below. I admitt i will miss the smell of raw sewage on a humid sticky hot summer day. Of course i will miss the door bell here too,, NOT so ! But so long as iam with my human owners,, i can get used to the country. ´´wasderface´´ comes from such a place.
We are talking no bus stops or anything in that stick place they lived and grew up in back in the states! I over heard a few words like tick , fleas, being used. I really dont know what they are, cause i was never outdoors . well a few times as a kitten in my first home where the fat drunken man tossed me and cain out .
Either way, something sucking my blood from me and buring its way under my skin is sick! I think that i will just say pfft and stay indoors.
ok nuff about the move thats yet to happen. lets talk, about links :)
being how iam a nice cat and there s really not alot to entertain you folks with, i decided to make some links for you folks to hit into your browser and have fun, or not.
good for news about whats really going down in washington!
pretty much the same but they want money from time to time. pay per view?
news for krauts about krauts.
for cool videos of ppl doing some really incrediable,, stupid stunts! some are funny some are like wtf?
everything you want to know about the mafia but were to afraid to ask Ö !
ok there are no more grizzly bears shhh they are sleeping now! but they have a polar bear cam set up . Hurry befour they all drown! :(
Now this guy worked his nads off to save many pets after katrina slammed into the gulf.
Amazing really. If you love dogs, then go here and see if you can help. if you hate dogs, go here,
http://www.catster.com/ and check out the cats there. Many are in need of homes , awaiting adoption.
Need to leave the country fast? forgot about that tax bill? look no further. Here you can find cheap flights in and out of the states and europe.
and if your tired of looking at your neighbor thru the spy glass, try this sight.
web cams all over the place. Why if your lucky you might even witness a robbery in progress, or perhaps a random mugging. My owners prefer to see differant countries that they cant set foot into due to well some fanatics making it impossible!
and so, thats it from my blog! time to gather my tired weary buttocks and go climb on the bed and suck the body heat from ´´the spoiler´´ and dream of tomorow which will consist of,, ?
thats the cool thing about life,, you dont know jack!
Take care fine folks and thanks for plopping and stopping on by to read my blog.
talk to ya tomorow.
Words of widsom,,,,,, its a crime to kill a praying mathis, yet in florida, someone can shoot you dead, IF they think you are killing a praying mathis!
CIAO!!!!!

Saturday, November 25, 2006

FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE, MURDER RUSSIAN STYLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Alexander Litvinenko's






Vladimir Putin.




Now if some of you folks have been following the news amid the holiday shopping frenzy or the endless turkey supply thats been forced down your pallet, you might be kinda scratching your head going ´´wtf´´?!
It seems that now in russia if you no likey the press or any outspoken former member of its russian cia version of spooks, its now the fashion to have those ppl killed.
Yes folks, it seems that good old Vlad can do pretty much whatever the hell he wants in order to quell any light being shed on his corrupted views and values over ppl and life.
heres my message to vlad, once a fucking commie always a commie! His fingers are just dripped with blood over the death of a female reporter who was found shot to death alittle over a month ago inside her moscow apartment. Nothing says love your style of writing then 4 bullets to the head.
And now we have yet another vic of good old vlad and his murderous ways. Alexander Litvinenko's . Why yes, he somehow came into contact with some form of massive radiation and boom he was in the hospital. Sadly he died, along with him, any info he had and was working on to expose good old vlad the terminator putin, and his illegal goverment he calls a free way of living.

But folks lets not forget that indeed our dear president bush declared that he looked into this mans eyes, saw his soul and it was good.!
so whatever jr. dipshit in the whitehouse says, well its gotta be true right? just like the war over in iraq is such a wonderfull state of affairs. Why even when big Dick was over there to offer support to the troops this past thanksgiving, he said things were going good.
of course the fat worthless lying piece of shit never set footout side the green zone and wouldint dare.
So while the USA turns a blind eye to what vlad and the boyz do in order to avoid bad press, the usa still condems some other goverments about thier lack of human rights?! oh please, piss up my leg and tell me its raining!
so thats my rant for politics tonight. Theres no way to change it so long as duffus and dumbass are in power and with thier special xray vision can proclaim, we looked inside and it was good!


ok new topic. oh and vlad,, go f--k yourself too,, ok where was i ? oh yeah new topic.

well thanksgiving came and went and no my owners didint rush out and hit the malls either today like they wanted. Once they got they there and saw bus after bus dropping off the older folks, they knew this was NOT a place they wished to spend 4 hours inside. so off to subways they went for a early lunch came home and did a ebay it baby for the things they wanted to buy for xmas. gotta admitt they saved some money on this idea too.

yes with ebay at least in the states, some morons with no scruples are bidding on OJ simpsons book. last bid was for 15,000 grand. thats alot of money to read pure bullshit. But some folks just dont care about anything but getting that book, reading it and knowing that the money went to some nutcase who still owes the victums familys some 3.something million they won in a civil court case.
FOX networks all of them , just showed the world that all they ever cared about was making money . be it on lies, or pure spin bullshit. fair and balanced my ass! about the only thing balanced is rupert murdocks bank books! all the rest is just that, shit! and if anyone still watches fox news, then i can only conclude that this is the type of person that eats canned spaghetios over the sink at night , in thier boxers and thinks they are a werewolf too!
sadly i wish i could say that last statement i made up, but one of my owners, actually knows a person like that over in the states!!! makes you once again go WTF??!!!!!!!
Well thats it from here folks. Hope the turkey day went well and all was content with the dinner and company that came along with it.
my dinner was good and my brother and i got our standard holiday meal too. yes yes, there are some folks out there who think, its just disgusting to feed pets human food for the holidays.
to folks like that i say, hey dont take so much pride with your cactus garden your made.
Prick!

thanks folks for stoping on down and reading my blog. talk to ya fine folks come monday. or maybe tomorow, depends on if anything new and exciting happens yanno?

WORDS OF WISDOM,

Give me liberity or give me death,,,,,,does not mean, give me my cable package without having to use the parental control that comes with it!

Thursday, November 23, 2006


SHOW ME THE TURKEY!!!!
Ever notice if your a cat that is, or maybe this includes you humans in this thought, that some folks just cant cook for beans? I mean we are talking the same ppl that IF asked to make someone a can of soup , it might result in a visit to the ER due to em not being able to handle the frigging can opener! When they do get lucky and manage to open the canned goods contents out into the proper pot pan or whatever the hell it is they used, they burn it ? not talking about slight burn either, iam talking the ´´do you smell smoke´´ holy shit the stoves on fire quick get the fire out and spray that baby´´!!!!
Thats how i think ´´wasderfaces´´ family back in ny , dinners gonna go tomorow for thanksgiven. It appears that certian family member of thiers cant cook anything but are one hell of a microwave cowboy! yes sir, ask em if they can nuke ya some tyson chicken fingers and folks they are faster then the non understandable dude behind the counter at Burger King. A conisoir of fish sticks and tator tots they are. Makes one might proud yanno?
anyways, speaking of cooking, tomorows the T day and being how ´´wasderface´´ is from NYS , they are cooking dinner for the big tday. At first they thought about some roast beast but decided nah lets do duck. Great, i like duck.
I mean here in Germany they do sell turkeys but either they are super steriod barry bonds type with 30 pounds of meat on em , or a ´´french ´´turkey. Which is nothing more then a 3 pound turkey killed in its youth. Go figure that one out for the french. So, the humans decided that eating a gloryfied chicken wasint up thier ally of ideas and decided the duck is the better deal. Besides, how can two ppl put away a 28 pound turkey? i mean without it going bad on day 6 ? sure ya can freeze it but after one week of turkey this and that , some major gags will occur.
The humans also talked about hooking the putes up to the tv to watch the MACYS PARADE via a live feed from the internet. Now thats something id pay to see yanno?
we dont have big ass inflated floats here in Germany. I mean yes we do but not of things that have anything to do with thanksgiving. We do have alot of inflated egos here with some of the young studs running amuck, but shit, half the time you cant understand them either. ill leave it at that. let ya folks to ponder it ;)~
HINT, turkey.
Other then above not alot to jabber about tonight. ´´the spoiler ´´ took friday off from work and the humans decided to hit the malls early befour all the kids get out of school. Its more fun shopping at the mall without having to fight your way thru cellphone ring tones going off all at once and massive over sprays of cologne or parfume from the young ones. Its enough to give you a coughing fit and migrane combined. Plus the old folks are easy to like over take during this time of the morning. Getting a parking spot is easy due to the old folks not being able to squeeze thier large cars into small parking spots. and ya can outrun em too, to the elevators. i know, some might consider this mean and rude, but my owners like to call it,, too bad? cause we all have been there at the mall when sally and her crew of 70 plus old crows just stand in the way, looking at stuff and wont move. maybe they didint hear the coughs,, the pardon me, but they really can hear well , when ya make a comment like,, ´´old ppl suck´´! oh yes then they hear you real well.
and the kids, forget hitting the stores for any video games of cool cellphones or things of this nature. its like playing crossing guard.
I think my owners are intitled to a day of shopping without granny and the kids yanno?
Nothing else to talk about. The presidents dad was insulted by the outrage some expressed at his son and his lack of leadership skills. old daddy bush told the crowd that his son was working very hard for peace. Rrrrrrright. Step aside 41, make room for reality. Your son messed up the country and pretty much a large part of the world. But i guess some parents, thier kids can do no wrong !
Well its that time where i paw my goodbyes on this blog and thank you folks for reading it. or not. hope everyone has a nice turkey day over in the states and no family fights errupt! nothing like saying ´´please pass the gravy you !"§$%&/()! ´´ At the dinner table with all the relatives :)!
Talk to ya fine folks later.
WORDS OF WISDOM.
You break it you own it!
CIAO!!!!!!!

Tuesday, November 21, 2006


BIG PUSSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now i kinda know that as soon as i used that name for this post, chances were and are that it might draw some attention to my blog post. However its not for reasons i would say id care to have! So for anyone reading this thinking,, oooooh yeah baby,, get lost its not what ya think its gonna be about moron!
Now that we cleared that up lets get this blog going. For folks who watch the sorpanos, from season one up to season 3, there was a character on the show called ´´big pussy´´. They never really said on the show how the name came about but folks thats what the characters nick name was.
Anyways, the character was like killed off and stuff, etc. Tonight as my very large brother cain plopped next to me on the couch, i couldint help but laugh when ´´wasderface´´ came out with that joke regarding cain! Because on the show the sopranos, big pussy was a big dude with no neck and lotta flab hanging off. Kinda what my brother cain looks like. I swear folks hes 24 pounds of a non stop eating machine. This cat will eat and eat untill he gets sick. Now that is SICK!
I ask em sometimes when me and him are at the food bowl,, chowing down, if he intends on leaving anything left for say next time. In between the snorts and sucking noises he makes as he eats, he reflects this question with a arched eye, and replies,, oh hell no! and continues on his mission to eat every last bit of food. It gets better folks. On a good day , he can keep it down.
Bad days,, it takes,, roughly 30 to 40 mins befour he gets sick, and makes those uck uck uck noises and backs up promptly leaving cigar shaped items on the floor.
Now ´´the spoiler´´ cant handle cat barf. Not alot of folks can. Cant say that i blame em yanno?
So ´´wasderface´´ has to clean the mess . Lo and be hold,, 15 mins later, there is cain, back at the food bowl, in a fat actress moment, attempting to clean the food bowl spotless.
Truely the cats a pig in the sence of the word!
anyways, nuff about cain and his big pussy status.
Things here are ok. Last night was one where ´´wasderface´´ got alittle pissy at the ps2 console because thier new game wouldint work. Awwwwwww cry me a river human ;)
It seems that certian ps2 consoles wont play blue disk games. And sadly thier new game they got, was one of this color and would not play. Sure it made a shit load of scratch noises during this discovery, and iam sure the door tray was worn out from repeated rebooting the system, not to mention the laser fried its self or will soon. However, after massive google time, they were informed by a many of folks who had the same problem and were kind enough to post thier drama about it on the internet.
so there lays the new game. worthless. The store they got it from wont take it back because the wrapping was off it. DUH !!!!!!!! i mean thats like buying some one a new iono pair of shoes and they wore em once 15 mins max and said, nope they dont like em and ya cant return it!
So the humans are out 20 bucks, a game lays in the game pile of the´´ dead shitty cant play it pile´´ and ´´wasderface´´ cant add anymore ps2 games to thier collection for now.
This means that the blue disk crappy game will go on the chalkboard , where ´´the spoiler´´ works ( its a comp program for ppl to post things for sale) and hope someone has a newer ps2 that can play it.
and no my owners are not about to tear apart the ps2 and do this and that and pray it works afterwards either. Besides, the game didint get all that great reviews anyways.
Ya live and learn humans.
So thats it from my part of the globe. Some cat owners are bright , some arent so. depends on the luck of the draw for us cats, as to which ones we get to stay with for life yanno? luck for us, my owners are somewhere in the middle. I can deal with this.
Take care fine folks who read this cats blog. for the ones that spied the BIG PUSSY header, sorry to dissapoint ya ;)~
WORDS OF WISDOM.
dont assume that non slip runners are just that. chances are, when you have to take off fast from one, you will slip and fall!
CIAO!!!!!!!!

BOUNTY PAPER TOWELS RULE
Well so here it is again. Monday! ugh more of the same monday cant seem to get out of second gear ,wish i could somehow go back to sleep inside my wickerball sleeping basket and say toodles to the rest of the day. Sadly in this house, mondays are hetic as both my owners are making the last min scramble over weather or not they did laundry during the weekend and have clean socks and drawers to wear. I dont know why the humans dont get thier stuff like taken care of sunday night yanno? it would spare me and cain of the ´´MOVE MUPRH´´ ´´ MOVE CAIN´´ attitude due to them being late for work. and they spill thier coffee all over the place cause they sip and fly thru the place getting ready! slobs! if it wasint for me who likes coffee the dribbles would stay on the floor untill they came home later that night!
Listen up folks, we are cats and walking in front of you is something we will do and well i might add anytime anywhere ! get used to it humans. Its not our fault because someone forgot to add the snuggles and now one has to go to work with rough as sandpaper underware ! nor is it our fault that one of the humans didint take the clothes from the dryer when it beeped and just opened the door to it and everything inside became more wrinkled then Kathy Harris face!! now thats mighty wrinkle city ppl! ( kathy harris is the crazy wacked lady in florida whos running or was running for office in the state of florida? google IT and you will find alot about this Beast Of Burden! BUTT UGLY!!!
On to other news. Sunday, as ´´the spoiler´´ was cleaning the tv screen, they inadvertinly set down a roll of paper towles on the couch. Folks once i spied that there was no stopping me! By the time one of the humans noticed this new game i found, there was only 3 sheets left on the paper towel roll! Prior to that it was a new roll! Its so much fun to shred the chit out it . Why ya claw and claw and it never ends! Plus ya can stick your face inside one end of the roll and on the other end, a paw and try to get both! I was coverd in paper towels and by the time the humans noticed, they werent mad at all! more like ehh is this a new game or a old one murphy always did? i aint telling. But cain tried to get in on the action and i told em to back off buddie this is mine! go shred the toilet paper roll in the bathroom.! cept cain cant reach it nor me but still.
so the humans watched me and laughed thier asses off . soon the couch was coverd with paper towels and somewhere in the huge pile was I ! lurking for anything that moved to get some major paw swipes at it :)When i poked my head out and saw the humans looking at me,, i kinda frooze and ran off. I didint know what to expect yanno ? But they werent mad at all and re rolled the paper towel roll off for me to use at a later date :)
My owners ROCK!!!!!!!
What else can i bore ya fine folks here tonight with? well its monday so there isint alot of stuff going on,,, just yet. give it say oh iono, tomorow. Oh and the humans went shopping for a new winter coat for ´´wasderface´´ seems thier old one, the zipper dont work anymore. sure it goes up but getting the zipper down is like a 10 min process. so befour it breaks completely or god forbid they are stuck inside the coat, they got a new one. Its teracotta color. To me its orange but Noooo, todays designers call it teracotta Oooooooh! if ya ask me, they look like either, the great pumpkin charlie brown or some hunter. but i guess its ok, meaning that they wont freeze thier ass off come this winter and a added plus, the zipper works going up and down on it too !
Plus , on the upside, if a blizzard hits, ya can easily spot em from 100 yrs away too.
well thats it from here. Like i said,, aint alot to jabber tonight with.
Glad to see that the folks who were waiting outside the stores for the nitendo wii didint get shot at or bid like fools for it on ebay. and no mobs of ppl running into light poles for it either . hahhahahaha .
Take care fine folks who read this blog. talk to ya ppl tomorow.
OH and ´´wasderface´´ got a new ps2 game too! Muhahahahha Ill let ya know how bad they sucked at this one. i will give em,, oh id say one hour befour they google for cheats! massive suckage !!
CIAO!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, November 18, 2006



THE END OF ANOTHER WEEK!
And so we have it folks. Friday eveing for some reading this, for me its almost saterday morning. Today was a good one. The sun was out and stayed out and there wasint a drop of rain to be found. GOOD! all this past week was rain and storms and shit that can make even little miss mary sunshine grab a ak47 and go postal! Ppl need the sunshine. without it, they become quite irritable, mean, snippy and just not a whole lotta fun to be around. Dont believe me?
ever notice for you drivers out there , when its raining and your out on the road, the more rude drivers you encounter then say when its a sunny day? Can you count on one hand when some old lady flipped you the bird on a warm sunny afternoon? my owners cant! Now come bad weather and rain and winds, they have counted 7 times for old folks fipping em off while driving.
grandpop deemed it his right to be let into the left lane and you didint see his blinker nor hear the constant blaring of his car horn so what does he do? once hes managed to squeeze his fat ass beamer into the left lane , hes looking over at you like its your fault! and sure enough you just know, that if you look at em, hes going to make some hand motion. It could be the bird , or the universal ´´are ya nuts´´? motion. Sometimes it can be the WTF! motion. This motion for old drivers is one that involves raising both hands from the wheel in a upward motion and slamming em back down ! I bet that has to hurt those arthritic hands alot but they still do it , to make sure you got thier point!
My owners least favorite on rainy days when old folks road rage, is the one that they call, the rock and roll drill! traffic jams here in germany on the autobahns are something normal and if you by accident didint see grandpa make all those hand motions we talked about above, then some of em have to get out of thier car.
Thus the rock and roll motion. Because its a huge car, small older person who has to rock to get out of the drivers seat , and with this rocking motion they can roll them wobble knees forward and make a bee line for your car.
And you know its going to be bad when grandpa or granny takes thier cane with em during this event and taps your car hood with it. Just to make sure you saw this old frail pissed off person coming on down your side of the traffic jam. If you havint seen them by now, your certianly going to hear them. Nothing like tapping the hood of a car with a cane . Its from there that once you rolled your window down and proceed to get a earfull from them, you start to think that every driver within eye view is seeing this argument . You and a old person. What do you do?
Nothing! just nod polite like and pray during the traffic jam, the granny or grandpa does not go into cardiac arrest ! So you let them rant and rave and tell them that the traffics moving again and pray thats the end of it.
sometimes it is, some times not. Hell, if your not so lucky and got picked by a really cranky old timer, they might even follow you home! thats where remote control garage doors come in handy! they are too quick for the old timer to get out thier car using thier rock and roll motion and by the time they do, your safely behind the solid silent doors to your home. thats where most of us probably do a little dance and mutter the words,, ´´ up yours´´! and smile with a evil victory like grin.
so thats about it from here and the weekly events. Not alot left to talk to ya fine folks about. Oh well, for the wallmart shoppers, who stand in line waiting for the ps3, you might want to get some bullet proof vests! i hear on the news now, those folks are easy pickings for armed robbery! what a novel idea!
morons, really.
so its weekend and that means time with my owners, so ill talk to you fine folks come monday. Have a great weekend and remember, let the old folks rant behind the wheel. someday that might be you !!
words of wisdom,,, never be envious of the greener grass on the other side. chances are a new septic tank was put in and thats new grass seeds your seeing grow!
CIAO!!!!!!!!

Friday, November 17, 2006


ZOO PICKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My owners waited 23 mins befour she turned around and gave em the pick they wanted. ugh 23 mins on your knees! i dont know how paris can do it without some serious pain.
The other pic on top i think is this gals boyfriend! hes a young silver back and not the alpha male in the group. It shows that clearly.



Heres another pic of some big ass grizzly bears!
can you imagine ever running into one of these bad boys? Its 10 miles of bad road.
My owners got lucky when the other bear opened his mouth to let out some form of either bored or very pissed at the flash from the digicam growl.
Iam very glad to know there is a 20 foot deep pit and cement wall that seperates humans from these fine man eaters Ö !!!!!!!!


Heres my cousin vinne. aint he looking fine and dandy?
you can tell by his eyes when you enlarge this , that vinnies looking straight at ´´the spoiler´´ when they took this one. All that seperates em was a moat of water and some flimsy electrical wire. Um if that were me, i would have taken the pics near the safe spot, the cement wall and even more electrical wire!




So, on to other stuff.
I checked out ebay and holy shit ppl, you wont believe how high those bids are going now for the PS3! even my owners were like,, ´´are those ppl f,,king nuts?´´
must be, because heres the copy and paste from the current ebay page






Enlarge
Playstation 3 PS3 60 GB with GAME + Overnight Ship
Best Friend is Store Manager, GUARANTEED to have on 17

26
$1,525.00
$49.99
Nov-15 10:29



Sony Playstation 3 PS3 60GB System Console Japan
Available Now! Free Shipping Insured!

-
$950.00
$30.00
Nov-15 01:34



Enlarge
SONY PLAYSTATION 3 PRESALE !!!! 60GB
Free Monster Cable HDMI with high bid

30
$1,824.00
Not specified
Nov-12 19:26
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

It kinda makes you think about some folks and thier bad case of ´´ wants´´.
glad my owners are NOT like that. Otherwise id starve and die due to no food and no vet visits because the money was spent on PS3!
speaking of the owners. This eveing they got thier flu shots. the doc told em, there might be a chance for 48 hours that you could feel like crap! meaning aches, pains low fever etc.
GREAT! get a shot so you wont get sick but it can make you sick for two days after! so ´´wasderface´´ is sluggish tonight and thier arm hurts where the shot was injected. As for ´´ the spoiler´´ they said,, oh f this news and went to bed very early. Hope they dont get sick on me! i mean without em , i dont get fed nor my cat box cleaned out and this cannot happen!
we musint let this take place. I think tomorow ill wake em early make sure they get up and feed me and cain , then clean the litter box out, scoop out my bad boy mt lion logs i laid down during the night and clean out the pop corn balls the litter makes when its activated with pp and then let em go back to bed. Cause iama nice cat like that yanno? always making sure the humans are ok and that my needs come first! ;)

SO thats it from here folks. Thanks for stoping on by and reading my blog. Hope you enjoyed the pics and vinne isint that much of a bad ass. on any day i could out run em and out smart em :)
Talk to you fine folks soon.

words of wisdom,,, If those who say they only drink beer because they like the taste, then ask them, why arent they drinking the alcohol free beer?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CIAO!!!!!

Thursday, November 16, 2006






THIS IS MY FACE ON CHINA CYMBOL 16 INCH NOISE!!!!!
























and this is the beast beat maker from kitty hell!



sure its pretty to look at. No not the drum set
I mean me!!!!!!!!! but now ya folks are aware at the noise that sometimes i must put up with during a cat nap .
ever lay there, kinda dozing and then suddenly BOOM comes a noise that makes you suddenly jump up and go what in the hell was that ?!
well thats sometimes what happens to me living here with the humans. The birds that ´´the spoiler ´´ and ´´wasderface ´´ used to have LOVED it when ´´wasderface ´´ played em. Sadly under mysterious circumstances the birds died.
They got another one, called em scotter but he was solo and not happy so they gave em to the vets and last they knew the bird was loving it there. Probably because cain nor myself was not rushing the bird cage and during one event, tipped it over too! Ö
but thats the drums that ´´wasderface ´´plays. I dont mind really. i usualy lay in front of the drum room and fall alseep to em. But id like a 3 min warning when they go to tune em and practice prior yanno? ever hear a china cymbol? it can wake any coma patient in a matter of seconds!
I like it when they play rock and new age stuff and some hard chit and newer stuff. I really dont like it when they are forced to play ABBA as ´´the spoiler´´ needs some beats when they practise the keyboard. its just um,, wording here, wrong!!!!!!!!!!!
ok new blog new night here and ebay and crazy folks still playing get that ps3 no matter what!
yes,, refinance your home because you missed a mortage payment for paying 1500 bucks on it!
if your lucky you can find a box with a mat thats close to a outdoor utility light pole and hook that ps3 up into the outlets that are at the base of the pole. But then you need a tv too. or just play it on the 4 inch dvd portable! ANYTHING TO GET THAT PS3! iam sure the folks down at the bank will fully understand your desire to miss payments and foreclose on the house because you just had to get that ps3!!!
oh and catster.com sent my owners a letter today, heres what it said and i guess iam some form of a trail blazer now with my suggestions . well,, thank you catster folks :)
Lee,Thanks, but I think maybe the first e-mail you refer to in Murphy's diary probably came from me, as well. I generally sign most perfunctory mails with simply "-catster-". When a member asks for additional information/dialog I then switch to my "community watch cat" signature. So most likely the ying and yang of mails you got were both from yours truly.Your "disclaimer" is an interesting idea. Of course, it requires unsupervised discipline to work. By that I mean, it undoubtedly would work while mommy and daddy are in the room, but what about the situation where the parent believes Catster to be safe and allows their youngster to spend time onsite at any time? The youngster reads the disclaimer and kids being kids reads the page anyway, then later mentions this unusual cat's page. The parent checks the page and before you know it we've got one of those angry parent "why is this on Catster!!" e-mails to deal with.This is not to say that your experiment (it can only be called an experiment since I know of no other pet page with such a disclaimer) is not worth trying. I'm just not very confident the approach will work in our community. I've passed this along to Randy, our Guide Cat. She is the principle author/editor of our Community Guidelines (http://www.catster.com/about/community_guidelines.php) and she will certainly consider your comments, especially about the Simpson's benchmark. We may need to rethink that particular phrasing. As you note, The Simpsons has raised its fair share of controversy over the years. When you're on the leading edge of culture change, uproar is part of your life.It may very well be that your new offsite blog for Murphy will be the best option for you to write with complete freedom and using Murphy's Catster Diary more for chatty stuff with your Catster friends. The family friendly credo is not going to be something we will change while Ted, John, and Steven are in charge. And the small team which has joined Catster/Dogster over the last year did so in no small part because of that family friendly atmosphere. I don't know how many years of total online community experience is represented by our team, but most if not all of us have spent a good deal of time in "open - anything goes" communities. Some of us worked for those types of communities and then chose to come to Catster and Dogster because we wanted to work in a different environment.We're glad you have chosen to dialog with us about this issue because it is near and dear to our hearts. We want to build upon our family friendly philosophy in ways that do not preclude adults having fun here, too. We don't think of ourselves as a community for children, rather as a community of adults who wish to be able to bring their children here. And the reasoning is really quite simple: pets are a unifying part of family life. Everyone in the family shares the responsibility and passion for the family cat or dog. Sure, a cat might be thought of as a particular family member's, but all will share in that pet's shenanigans. Sterling was "my" cat, but my daughter just naturally thought of him as hers. He's been gone for almost 5 years, but the memories we share of him are an undeniable bond. This sort of thing is why we believe so strongly in "family friendly" as an over arching principle. Cats and dogs draw kids like magnets. And even those who do not have children would admit that a beloved pet is family pure and simple.Well, that's enough of me yakking for now. Thanks for making changes to Murphy's page. We're interested to see how the disclaimer idea works out.And thanks for loving Catster. We love you right back!Meow!-catster-----------------------------------------------------------------------------Dogster & Catster: where no one knows you're a humandogster.com / catster.com
see i can deal with ppl like this. and i MIGHT make a few entrys again on there, but only for xmas complaining or other holiday stuff. I like my blog and am happy that no ones complained and wont ! it might suck to some reading this but i didint make the blog for you yanno? i made it for me,,murphy. I need my creatvie side not hinderd by ppl who are easily offended :)
But kudos for catster and them seeing things alittle bit my way ;)
well thats it from here. time to get going and watch the news with my owners. well one of em , the other is sleeping. Thanks fine folks for stoping on by and reading my blog. I ll talk to ya fine folks soon.
words of wisdom,,, Live for yourself, because no one else will!!!
CIAO!!!!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006


WHOA!!! adjust that shutter speed next time folks!
well , another eveing and another post. I must inform you reading this , that nothing new took place between yesterday and tonight.
I know its a dull slow life i live here. Anyways here a link to the cat page iam still on but my owners no longer post my journal there due to some being ´´offended´´ ahem,,,
Ill let ya fine folks judge for yourself on that grand conclusion that was made ;)
There ya can see all the friends I made on there, how many times i won due to my journal entry and whatnot. Man i made a shit load of friends on there too! just read murphys bio and scroll down to see who this cats friends are.
On another note, i checked ebay again, this time i spied the PS3 going for bid at 1,500$
a fool and his money are soon parted yanno? now the news is that there are glitches for the ps3 and it wont play older games like it promised! WELL ISINT THAT SPECIAL! Thats like buying a car but it cant go in reverse so make sure you are capable of using wide U turns.
the stupidity of some iam telling ya folks.
lemme see what else i can blog about tonight, well the cover of newsweek with gwb looking like a small kid and being led by his dad ghwb and the caption, father knows best! OUCH!!!!!!!
now that has to sting if i was the president and saw that little bitch slap, but it seems that its the truth and once again daddy has to bail out the loser . this time he bankrupted a entire country not just some oil company. LOSER!!!
Oh and it seems that cyrstal meth has made its way here to germany. how wonderfull for us non druggies! why its so potent that it even melts the euro currency . imagine shoving that shit up your nose. can you say,, dead in 4 yrs? yet some folks dont get it or dont care.
never understood why ppl piss thier life away on drugs. sure sure, the humans here give me a knockout pill when its time for my vet visits. but only because i refuse to be stuffed inside the pet carrier. but the effects from it, cant say that iam like wow dude,, got anymore?
but thats just my observations, from a cat.
also in the news over in the UK some folks are suing the goverment . it seems that once they have been arrested for herion possesion they are locked up, given methedone for 28 days then thats it. Those assclowns are saying that is cruel and should stopped ! how wacked can it get when some druggie has more rights then say you or i or my owners? detox em the hard way.
ya get nothing and like it and ask for seconds! whats next? ppl who were convicted of murder and who get let out of jail will now bitch that its not fair they cant own any weapons?
seems we are being to pussy on criminals and being too hard the law abiding folks who uphold the laws. nuffs nuff folks. But then again,, look at the UK!
well thats my view from the litter box this eveing. If it offended you, well tough! some things ya just cant sugar coat yanno?
take care fine folks who read this blog. talk to ya probably tomorow :)
words of wisdom.
dont rob peter to pay paul!
CIAO!!!!!!!

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

THRILLING ISINT IT? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Well, another day and another post. actually its eveing here where iam. 6 hours ahead of NY time. Think, the land of wild pigs and beer! no , not your brothers girlfriends house! GERMANY!

so lets blog this bitch already.

The other day as ´´the spoiler´´ was talking to one of thier friends,via phone, in the background was some fuss over a spider that had crawled inside the other partys house. ´´ The spoiler´´ was mortified when thier friend told thier kids, dont worry let the cat get it! Ö WTF???
I mean, sure let the cat get it. and get sick too! some folks are , MORONS!
so in another installment of my lists, heres one i compiled . Its what cats wont get , eat or take care of for you lazy ass humans!
Birds!
somehow the idea of getting my eyes pecked out by tweety isint grand in my book. not to mention the possiblity of bird flu. Ill pass on this one, thanks.
Mice.
They have fleas! i mean who wants to eat something that plays host to a parasite?
plus they have long tails too. another dinner id not eat.
Snakes.
Will the humans suck my paw after iam bitten? get real folks. Iam not gonna play the snake flute and get bit ! let the pros do that in a wicker basket, in a van down by the river!
Rabbits.
Thinks large white buck teeth that bite plus i will not go down in history as the cat that slaughterd the easter bunny either.
Bats.
Oh your really dreaming on this idea! if you want that bat out of your house, use the broom or the pellet gun! aint nooooooo way me and the count are going to meet face to face!
Bees.
oh yes!! watch us chase a hornet and not make a attempt to kill it befour it kills us. Who would let thier cat go after a bee? well other then the cat nazi iam sure but, iam just saying !
so thats my list of things that sadly,, you humans are gonna have to face yourself should they make its way inside your house, or garage or back yard or anywhere.
Its called,, self preservation and iam liking that word more and more. I dont know if the spider cat actually ate the thing or the person on the other end of the phone smooshed it. Id like to hope they got off thier lazy ass and took care of it and not let the cat do so .
New topic.
PS3! yes yes, it only goes now , on ebay for over a grand, and to think that ppl are biding on this new gadget is like ehh? For on thing its the japan version, so ya gonna have to buy a diff power plug so it dont blow your fues or it blows the game. second, iam sure your going to have to MOD it so it can play differant countries versions of ps2 games. and third, who would piss away over one thousand dollars on ebay for something that will be in the states and here in the EU come next spring?
Ill tell ya who. the spoiled folks, who want it nowwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
well id like a frigging rolls royce for my trips to the vets too, but when that happens, is when fried chicken flys into my mouth.
I think this might be the end of SONY! they lost too much money on the battery thing and now this?
stick with the xbox 360, if one must upgrade from the ps2. or the nitendo game console thats coming out very soon. send sony a message that we arent mindless droids that piss away money.
My owners said, nope, they arent going to buy the new ps3 . i think they rather use that money on me and cain :) !!!!!!!
so thats it from the litterbox this eveing. Hope you enjoyed our time we spent. if not, ill be sure to add a complaint form on this blog .
Talk to you fine folks soon. take care and thanks for stoping on by and reading my blog.
words of wisdom, never walk across the carpet in the winter with wool socks and pet your dog or cat. the outcome can be quite nasty! not for us,, for the humans ;) !
CIAO!